Writing A Fairytale Adventure (Part 2)

Hi folks! This is part two of the children’s book i am writing (or attempting to write).  If you did not see my previous post, I am posting a new section of my book every week so please check out the first section before reading this one. Enjoy!

The Bramblewood Tales

Chapter 1: Make-believe: Section 2

Back in the woods, after defeating the snow monster, and finishing their trip to the moon on a spaceship, the girls had now built a raft and were floating down the river while being chased by natives. As the girls floated farther and farther down the river, they also drifted deeper into the forest, until the house was completely out of sight.  “Where are we?” asked Olive with uncertainty after a while of rowing.  “Well, I suppose we are half way to Australia by now”, said Story confidently. “No, in real life where are we?” begged Olive. “Oh”, said Story as she stopped paddling. “I’m not quite sure, but the house is probably on the other side of those trees.”  Both girls anxiously walked toward the trees Story had pointed at, but they still could not see the house.  “Oh no!” exclaimed Olive in despair “We’ve lost our way”.  “No worries, Olive, soon it will be lunch time and Grammy will call for us, so we can follow her voice back home,” reassured Story. “Let’s just sit here and listen for her”.

The girls sat on a large stump and began listening in silence for their grandmother’s voice.  As they waited and listened, the silence became so silent that it began to get very loud, the ancient trees creaked in the wind and the air seemed to turn colder within seconds.  “Its ok, Olive, don’t be frightened,” encouraged Story after seeing Olive’s uneasy expression.  “We will be home before you know it, plus what in these wonderful woods do we have to be afraid of?” No sooner had these words escaped from Story’s mouth that a booming noise came from behind the brush, that was so loud that it gripped both girls with absolute fear!  It was unlike any sound the little girls had ever heard in their entire lives. It started off like a song with mumbled words but soon grew distressingly louder and finally into a full on scream! Whatever the sound was, and whatever made the awful noise was more information than Story and Olive wanted to know. In a frenzy, both girls bolted through the woods away from the horrible sound.  They ran and ran, not thinking of anything except running faster.  They ran until their legs ached with exhaustion, but they dared not stop. Deeper and deeper into the forest, dodging trees and trying their best to avoid the painful sting of tree branches.  Olive, though she was quite fast for her age, was naturally a few steps behind Story, which was nice because her big sister could bend the branches back, allowing Olive to go through untouched. Then suddenly, Story came to an abrupt halt which then caused Olive to accidentally slam into the back of her, knocking them both to the ground. Being a little disoriented, the girls slowly picked themselves up and began dusting themselves off. “Why did you stop so fast?” asked Olive bitterly. “Look,” whispered Story in amazement. She pointed through the trees as she gazed at what had caused her sudden standstill.  Olive stepped forward, pushing back the branches that obstructed her view. At first she couldn’t see anything because the sun was blindingly bright; causing her to squint to see what was before her.  As her eyes adjusted, Olive realized that it was a wide clearing in the trees, but instead of just any old clearing of grass, this one was a field of wild flowers. All different kinds of beautiful wildflowers sun bathing in all their splendor.  There were Indian paint brushes, black eyed susans, blue bonnets, daisies, buttercups, and many more full of enchanting color.  The sisters gazed at the breath-taking sight with their mouths slightly open in awe of what was before them, so much so that even their thoughts were whispered.  “How can this be”, wondered Story aloud. “It is Fall, and most things are dying but these flowers look as if they have just bloomed”.  “Who cares. They are too beautiful to care about anything else. I feel like a princess.” said Olive in almost a daze, as she did a curtsy with an imaginary skirt.  Story, after giggling at her sister’s dramatic comment, unexpectedly began running with her arms stretched open, like an angel preparing for flight, through this field of wonder, and Olive quickly followed.  They danced with the daisies, swayed with the sunflowers, and bowed with the buttercups, laughing joyfully and pretending they were royalty and this stunning garden was planted specifically for them to enjoy.  The smell of each flower swirled and kissed the scent of another until a masterpiece, as glorious as the constellations in the heavens, drifted into the children’s noses and it was so pure and wonderful, it was as if they had breathed for the very first time.

As the girls played, they forgot their worries of finding Grammy’s house and the strange sound that had frightened them so, and instead entered into a world of pure imagination and delight.  After a while, the girls gradually grew tired and laid down in this enchanted garden to sun bath beneath the petals that melodically swayed back and forth in the gentle breeze. “Wow, this is so amazing. I can’t believe we are amongst all these beautiful flowers,” said Story in awe after a while of gazing into the sunshine.“I know… I love all the color… Wait do you hear that sound?” asked Olive quickly as she sat up, leaning on her elbows, “It sounds like trickling water! Let’s go see!” Olive jumped up and shuffled toward the edge of the clearing on the opposite side of the way they had entered, for the sound of a bubbling stream seemed to be just on the other side of the canvas of trees.  Story wanted to ignore her sister and instead relax in the bed of wildflowers, but soon curiosity got the better of her and she joined Olive in the pursuit of the hidden flowing water.  As the girls parted the branches to get a better look, they found a mysterious stream, flowing in a thin curvy line through the forest. “Ah, I’m so thirsty, do you think it would be ok to drink this water?” asked Olive. And Story, who felt very strongly that living in the outdoors meant living off of the land in a very real sense, adamantly responded “Oh, it should be just fine to drink, as long as it’s a running stream, and doesn’t smell weird” and she thought to herself that was a pretty good answer.   So they both reached down and took a big gulp of what they thought was the coolest, and purest water they had ever tasted, as anyone would think when they are feeling dehydrated and are able to finally quench their thirst. But as Story reached down into the stream, she saw her distorted reflection in the rippling water, but as it cleared, for a split second, she did not recognize the image she saw. It startled her just a bit, for she thought she saw a sweet, majestic face in the stream; a face that was regal, wise, and mature. But as the instant soon passed, she realized, rather hoped, that the only thing she saw in the cool winding stream was her own girlish face.  “Hey, let’s follow this stream and see where it takes us!” suggested Olive adventurously. Before Story could hesitate about the idea because she knew Grammy would soon be getting worried, Olive grabbed Story’s hand in persistence and so giving in, Story and Olive made a trek up stream to find the end, rather beginning, of this mystifying creek.  And to be truthful, Story welcomed the sudden distraction from her thoughts of the face she thought she saw in the water.

“I wonder what we will find when we get to the source of this stream. Maybe it stemmed off from a raging river or maybe it’s from a natural spring from the ground!” exclaimed Olive with excitement. “Well, we might not even make it to the end, because who knows how long it is, even if it is quite thin” remarked Story.  The girls chatted back and forth about their imaginative ideas about what they would discover as they walked.   After a while, getting lost in conversation, which is a common occurrence among the female gender, the girls realized that they had no idea how long they had been following the curvy brook.  Story and Olive both felt as if they couldn’t remember what life was like before they started into the unknown forest, pursuing the source of this creek , which at this point seemed to have grown significantly and would probably be considered a river. You know how you feel at the end of a movie after you have thrown yourself into the story, and suddenly it’s over and you feel as if you have just woken up from an intense dream? That is how they felt, following the clear water of the rivulet in dreamy daze.

Then as suddenly as the sisters fell obliviously into this sleepy state, their mind’s eye popped open as if they had been awaken by something, and yet they had heard nothing nor felt anything that would have disturbed their day dreamy conversation.  But now alert, the girls remembered that they shouldn’t go too far in the woods because they still needed to find their way back to Grammy’s house. “Oh no,” exclaimed Story, “The sun is starting to go down.  Grammy must be terribly worried about us. How did we get so distracted by that stream that we totally lost track of time?” “But how do we get back now?” panicked Olive.  “Well I remember the sun sets on the other side of Grammy’s house, so maybe we can go toward the sun and hopefully make it back home, I guess.” said Story, trying to be hopeful.  “Sounds good to me” said Olive.  The path that the girls decided to go toward just happened to continue to follow the winding stream for a little ways until in bent toward another course.  Both girls began making their way in the direction of the setting sun, now desperate to find their way home.

Of course, this would have been a fine solution on a normal day, but we have already established that something quite out of the ordinary was going to take place. In fact, the mysterious stream gliding silently through the wood was only one diversion that would coax the sisters even closer toward an adventure that they would have never expected.   Something so magical and bizarre would soon be uncovered that even the forest, himself wouldn’t be able to grasp exactly what had happened, even though he had the best seat in the house as to what would soon come to pass.

End of Chapter 1

This post is dedicated to my sweet baby sister, Vayle.


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2 Responses to Writing A Fairytale Adventure (Part 2)

  1. Pingback: The Bramblewood Tales (Chapter 2; part 1) | The Ozark House

  2. Meghan says:

    I’m so sorry it has taken me so long to sit down and read some of your book! I’ve made it through chapter 1 and am loving it! You have a beautiful way of describing things! Your choice of words really bring the story to life and it’s so easy to just imagine all the scenes you place before us!

    I love that you picked “Story” as the older girls name! And I really found myself wondering why the parents choice it. It’s a small detail but I think a little back story might contribute to why the girl is the way she is!

    The beginning and end of this chapter is absolutely amazing! The first paragraph in your book really draws the reader in to the point where we can’t wait to hear more and the end of the chapter opens the readers imagination to the mystery of what’s to come! If you can nail it so well in the first chapter, I know the rest will be a success!! I look forward to reading more of it! =)

    And I know that you said you have some grammatical editing to do, but I was just going to point out that many of you sentences use both past and present tense at the same time and can sometimes get confusing. I do this ALL the time when I’m writing. I get caught up in just getting all my thoughts on a page that I don’t even worry about how it sounds until I go back through to do the editing.

    I hope you have had a good weekend and that the week ahead will be great! I look forward to seeing you at work soon (I work this weekend-Memorial weekend, I’m crossing my fingers that you do too!)

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